Thong days

Come on ladies, admit it. We've all suffered these God forsaken days. The ones that go from bad to worse!!!

They're the ones that start with no clean knickers. The thong day has you rummaging through your underwear draw in search of just 1 pair, but no.

Ah ha!! The ironing pile will save me!! And after ten minuets of hunting through the tower of fabric waiting in vain to one day be crease free!! You are now stood naked with not an inch of bedroom floor visible!!

In your panicked state of desperation, You briefly contemplate wearing a pair out the wash bin. Before returning to the knicker draw. 

FOR GOD SAKE THERE MUST BE ONE PAIR STILL IN THERE!!!!!!

and that's when you discover it. Hiding in the depths of beyond. That ridiculous, lacy, 2 sizes too small. Thong, leftover from a bygone you :/

It will have to do. You concede defeat and accept today will just have to be a thong day.......

Your naked pre-schooler comes and sits on your nice clean bed...........after not wiping his bum properly!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course he has, today's a thong day.....

You try to feed the offspring but there's no milk and only the soggy ends of the bread!!!!!!

Of course there is, today's a thong day.......

You open the living room door and step bare foot into a pile of cold cat sick!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, today is most definitely A. THONG.   DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

why do kids do that!!!!

Parenting truly is a journey without an end, a learning curve without any exam results. From the moment your pee on the little plastic stick turns pink (or blue if you've splashed out on a brand name test, instead of 30 for £1 off ebay!!) this magical journey begins. A journey where you can feel scared but happy at the same time. where you will be both right about everything and also completely wrong about everything. Where you can be totally stressed and exhausted one minute. Then dancing round the room to cbeebies, whilst doing over exaggerated facial expressions the next!!!!

Kids do that to you. And worst of all it becomes so normal, you find it acceptable to not only do it all around your own children. But other peoples children too!!!

pregnancy really does go some way in preparing you for the strange being about to enter and 'modify' your world as you know it. It deprives you of all your usual comforts. Sleeping on your stomach, owning clothes that fit and are not held together with string, while a dress masquerading as a top tries to conceal the homemade contraption. shoes that not only fit but you can get on without the aid of the stairs. Being able to turn the steering wheel without having to do the special k jeans manoeuvre. It prepares you so well that by the time you've finally had the baby. You don't have an 'old life' to miss.

kids do that to you too. for example Friday evening pre-offspring.  I would be thinking about finishing work as quickly as I can, and getting down town in the new outfit that's been waiting for me all day. Friday evening post-offspring. Im usually thinking about finishing the bedtime routine as quickly as I can and getting down stairs to the new pile of washing up that's been waiting for me all day!!! (sad confession.............. I prefer the post-offspring Friday!!!! pregnancy did its job reaaaalllllly well on me!!!)

And when your little one arrives you get to spend years pondering the question 'why do kids do that?'. Why do they turn there head as soon as the tissue makes the slightest contact with there nose, Thus spreading mucus up there entire cheek!!!!!. Why do they insist on only drinking juice that has bits of food floating in the top?. Why do they have to make strapping them in the carseat or buggy into an aerobic workout? (dvd to follow ;) Why do they have to spin round and round when they are on reigns? or lose the use of every muscle in there body when the word 'NO' is uttered, even whispered? and why do they have to lift both there feet off the ground if both hands are in contact with another persons...........even if the other person is the same age as them!!!!!???

these are just some of the great mysteries of the world I now inhabit. Im pretty certain I shall never know the answers..........................But its looks like a pretty fun journey trying to find out :)